Just for fun: Winter in Pennsylvania
Today’s the first day of winter! I already can’t wait for spring. But for fun, I thought I’d share this, which I received in an e-mail from my mom some time ago. (Comments in parenthesis are all mine; I don’t know the original source.)
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you might live in Pennsylvania. (I know I herald the reopening of Sherry’s in Dover every spring; thankfully, Dairy Queen manages to be year-round!)
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t even work there, you might live in Pennsylvania. (Hey, we’re friendly. And we know our hardware stores.)
If you’ve worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Pennsylvania. (This includes Hubby as well as my high-school boyfriend, who loved to wear shorts and deck shoes to shovel snow. my husband is not that bad. Thankfully.)
If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Pennsylvania. (Our sister paper, the Evening Sun in Hanover, actually ran a column about this earlier this year.)
If “vacation” means going anywhere south of the Mason-Dixon Line for the weekend, you might live in Pennsylvania. (I might also add: If your vacation includes the phrase “hunting cabin.”)
If you measure distance in hours, you might live in Pennsylvania. (Doesn’t everyone do this??)
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you might live in Pennsylvania. (I’ve had a deer INSIDE MY HOUSE. Thankfully not more than once.)
If you have switched from heat to A/C in the same day and back again, you might live in Pennsylvania.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you might live in Pennsylvania. (I have been known to set my house alarm and leave a door unlocked. What of it?)
If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you might live in Pennsylvania. (You never know. Some years, snow; other years, shorts.)
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph and you’re going 80 and everybody is passing you, you might live in Pennsylvania. (And you’re almost certainly on 83 or the Turnpike.)
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you might live in Pennsylvania.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you might live in Pennsylvania.
If you actually understand these jokes, and share this post with your Pennsylvania friends and others, you definitely do live – or have lived – in Pennsylvania!
(And if you liked this, you should check out two fairly old posts on this blog, You know you’re from Pennsylvania if… and Talking Pennsylvanian.)
